Callisto's Daydreams & Cosmopolitans

"My name is Allison, And i have a large clitoris"

I got a visit from a childhood friend a little while ago. Allie, I'm pretty sure there are some pictures of her in my blog's photo album. And I know I've mentioned Allie's..Uhm, classic blonde ditzyness. Of course, Allie isn't stupid. Not by a long shot. For starters, she's a musical genius. And as it turns out, much to my surprise, pretty damn good with numbers. Okay, now that one came as a shock to me. Came as a shock to her. But, she IS a ditz. And i love her. She is my most loyal friend. No one has ever come close to her level of understanding, compassion or unconditional love.

But once again, she IS a ditz. And that is taken to the extreme when she drinks, as you can imagine. And your probably wondering what the hell the quote on the top is all about. Well, Me, Allie and Jaime went out for a few drinks and a few games of pool on the second night she was here. We found this place called Bennigans. It was a restuarant and bar with 2 levels. Except that the 2nd level appeared to never be in use. Conveniently, thats where they kept the 2 pool tables, which we had all to ourselves. The bummer part was the bar that was open was downstairs. You can imagine how difficult it is to carry up three pint glasses of beer up a flight of stairs drunk. Being a waitress, i had an advantage. But i still lost a lot of alcohol. *sniff* Brave little guys.

I was trying to concentrate on the game, so i wasnt talking much, but every few minutes, the conversation between Jamie and Allie turned to sex. At some point, Allie admitted that her boyfriend said she had a large clit. At which point, she stood up and said "My name is Allison and i have a large clitoris". Jaime laughed so hard at this odd comment that he spit his beer out and up to his face. He stumbled off to the bathroom to clean up.

For the record, i've seen it, and she does NOT have a large clitoris. Its perfectly normal.

She was also convinced that our waiter was Frodo. Everytime he came and went she'd call him Elijah. Pretty soon, she was crawling on the floor under the pool table, grabbing my foot and saying "Prrreeeeeshhhus!", and i was on top of the tables, hitting my head on the street sign decorations. As far as i know, Jaime remained with his feet on the floor.

We stopped in a few sex shops, as is the custom with Allie and me. And eventually made it home. Allie threw her birth control pills at me, fell on the floor a few times and harrased me ENDLESSLY as i tried to write out a post. "Moooooollllllyyy! Come and cuddle with me!!!!" "Mooooolllllyyyy, paint my toenails!!!" "Mooolllllyyyy! Moooolllllyy! Mooolllllllyyy!" I was sober by this time, so it wasnt nearly as cute. Somehow, i was the first one sober. I'll never figure that one out.

It was so quiet once she passed out. So very quiet.

The next day, Allie woke up with a wicked hangover, which she isn't used to. And that pretty much killed her desire to drink any more that trip. It usually takes a few days, but she drank her 4 day limit in a few hours.

Thats my girl.